Tuesday, March 17, 2009

tea time :)

I really like drinking tea. I just bought this new tea: raspberry and apple. Totally delicious. I feel so fancy when I drink tea. I have this ceramic cup I drink out of every time I boil the water. I love it because it has a ceramic top that I use to keep my tea warm, and then I put my tea bag on it :) I feel fancy with my mug.

Monday, March 16, 2009

spring spring spring!

Today was lovely! A beautiful and warm day, a taste of spring weather. I am so excited and I am more positive then ever. The signs of the new season always seem to awaken me and make everything feel new and fun again. Sunshine makes me dance when I walk, smile when I talk and it makes me invent  songs :)

I am very anxious to start wearing dresses every day as I do when spring and summer arrives. Today I wore one of my favorite button down dresses with white cowboy boots and my jean jacket.  I felt very beautiful. Mike and I took a drive down to the country listening to groovy tunes and soaking up the rays

I got a hair cut Friday! I like it, it's very girly and cute. It's a lot of fun.

I'm a lover and I feel awesome right now! 

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

naked in your sweater

I feel my eyes could use some rest
My hair is dry
My heart's a mess
There are things
I feel like I should do
before I hit the hay
Even though 
I have nothing to do all day

I think I will sing a tune
post for you
And then stray

To my sheets
To the heat
To my dreams

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

i'm a slob today. a big real one.

I woke up 12hpm today and my apartment is literally upside down. I am due for a shower and I feel really gross. The kitchen is full of dishes and there are some noodles and sauce from last night still out- yuck. I feel super gross. Lazy. I'm wearing my glasses this morning. Er...afternoon. 

I really don't like video games, because they captivate you and suck you in: turning you into a slob. I'm a slob today. I was a slob last night. I played video games until 1h30 am eating popcorn and drinking chocolate milk. Mike likes video games and I like pacman, so he got a pacman video game. Instead of doing dishes I played with him. He left for his midnight shift and I continued playing. 

Blargh! I will do nothing! I will take advantage! I have a little vacation for a few days due to the sudden unemployment and I will benefit! So what I didn't do dishes last night? Yeah! And now, in all slob-ness, I think I will play pacman again for a bit. Then I'll wash.

Monday, March 9, 2009

taste the la, la, la

Thats what my salad felt like in my mouth. Mmmmmmm

I accidently put too much salad dressing in it, so good thing the lively flavors were up to good acts today! They were dancing all over my taste buds!

You want to try?

Lettuce/ cherry tomatoes/ orange pepper/ portobello mushrooms/ cucumber/ onions/ cheese/ avacado/ ginger-sesame tofu/ pepper/ oregano/ basil

Chop & Toss & Presto! It's very filling. If you can, going organic really makes a difference in taste ;) 

Hey! While I have your attention do you think I would make a good airline pilot? Hm, I think I would make a hot pilot for sure. 

my pretty kitchen table clutter

dark morning

So Saturday night we all lost an hour, I guess. It seems weird that we all think it was erased. It wasn't. The world just re-established what time it was in human. In reality, time does not move back and it does not skip; it stays the same. Time is only measured because we invented measurements. Nonetheless, it was dark outside this morning as I left for work which now seems like foreshadowing. It's usually always daylight when I leave, but I awoke earlier due to the 'change in time'. (I still think that's so funny!)

I was barely at work a half hour before being called into my boss' office. The news they gave me didn't shock me. I just didn't expect today. I mean, I didn't wake up this morning thinking: today I'm going to get laid off.

It's not a big deal because I really didn't like my job at all. I loved the people I worked with, and they've been so kind to me. Actually, I couldn't figure out how to quit. My emotions were muddled and I had my morals all mixed up. Anyway, economic times are tough and the company couldn't afford me anymore.

Damn. I was wearing a really cute outfit today too. I bought a shirt at Simon's over the weekend with one sleeve for five bucks. I matched it with a pair of pretend peacock feather earrings. I look so darn ready for Cuba. All dressed up and nowhere to go. Sigh.

They told me I could leave right away and they would pay me for the two weeks. It's required to give that much notice, and they couldn't very well leave me with nothing. So here I am. At home on my Mac. Just contemplating. I think this is a very good thing though. I feel very liberated.

I am not really stressed at the moment and I know something will come along. There's an unlocked door somewhere that I need to open. I'm excited and happy, and I'm not gloomy at all. As I drove home a few flurries of snow fell from the sky. Mother nature can be so darn symbolic sometimes.

eve of new, eve of better

I promised to tell you all about the lovely little snippets of great that flowed through me Wednesday evening. I had the surgery that morning and was feeling wonky and super funny. I called maman and talked to her for a while. I told her all about it: how I felt, how I was scared, how I cried, how I walked, everything. I confided every detail in her and it was so relieving. We laughed together. I love her so much. 

While I was on the phone with maman, Mike was on the phone with Elise. I had spoken to Alexa, but 
hadn't any news of the operation yet, so Mike filled her in for me. Mike came inside and I had my maman on speaker phone so he stuck his cell phone next to mine and maman and Elise said hi to each other! It was so funny! Then maman told me Elise finally found a roommate. This was great news to hear and I was so happy for her! It's stressful looking for a coloc, and that stress was now gone. 

Mike works nights so due to the fact that I was still half-disabled, we asked  Alexa and her boyfriend Jon to watch me for the night. How sweet of them when they said yes! Mike picked them up and brought them back. When they arrived I was still on the phone with maman, and she was still on speaker so Jon and Alexa said hi. I immediately noticed how Jon's cheeks were fuller! He was dangerously thin when Alexa met him, and she's been helping him gain weight. Yay! What progress! How up-lifting to see the efforts beginning to show success! He's very tall and previously, he was looking terribly unhealthy. He'd never been officially diagnosed, but everyone was thinking the same thing. He was smiling from ear to ear. His happiness and self-pride was shining like a beacon of light on his handsome face. He looked beautiful!

As Jon and Alexa had just arrived, I decided to wrap things up, so I asked to speak to daddy. He came onto the speaker phone and we all said hi : Mike, Jon, Alexa and me. Alexa and Dad hadn't spoken in a while so he told her he loved her very much and that she should call him soon because he misses her. Then Alexa informed him, as well as Mike and I, that she had a job interview on Saturday! What great
 news! I am telling you positive energy was flowing through my entire family like a hot-flow circuit. I could feel it. 

And right then, it seemed as though we were all moving ahead in a great movement of change. It felt like we were all standing on the same ground, and that ground was pumping with happiness. I imagined us disco dancing to "We Are Family" and laughed out loud. I love my family, and we're not perfect, but that's the best part. We each celebrated a victory of sorts that night, but shared the great news as one. And although we are all adults now, living independently, we were all together in that moment.

I am so grateful to be a part of such an amazing team: Team Holmes!

Thursday, March 5, 2009

I have Endometriosis.

To learn more about that click here.

Previously, I blogged of the possibility that I may have Endometriosis. I had the surgery on Wednesday, March 4th, and it turns out that the diagnosis returned positive. It's been a long time wondering, and I was filled with so many emotions that day. I turned to Mike and said, " I have it. I have Endometriosis." I barely got through half the sentence before I began to sob the words. I cried with complete joy and utter relief. I finally know what's wrong. I am still sore and lack energy, but so happy that the wait is finally over. They burned off the tissue with a laser as soon as they discovered it through Laparoscopy and now I will contine to follow the treatment taking Depo Provera, which is a form of birth control used to treat Endometriosis. It's an injection that needs to be taken every three months with a needle, and it completely stops your period. Without my period, I should no longer experience any pain. Currently I have pain killers and anti-inflammatory medications. I also have urinary tract antibiotics because unfortunately, my surgery caused me to have an infection. Now I'm on a healing road, and recovery is going super. I am so happy that now I can begin to live a healthy life again. I have so much news about the lovely evening that followed my surgery, but I will fill you in on that later :) As for now, I'm great, life's great and Hallelujah.

warm sunny drive

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

the night before surgery.

what color do you feel like today?

Recently, I have a growing fantasy to own 1, ooo, ooo different colors:

In the last few years I've been really conscious on setting myself free of materialism. I would be lying if I said I loved myself 100%. I mean, yes, there are days when I feel less-than-flawless and I admit to having tried a number of different beauty services. I used to get acrylic nails a lot because I used to bite my real nails to the skin. I wanted to feel more girly, which in the end, made me feel prettier. With time, I've completely stopped biting my nails. They're still a little weak and break sometimes, but I have got them long most times au naturel, and they will strengthen in time. I stopped wearing nail polish for a while so that my nails could recover from the super-toxic-badness of acrylic. But now, suddenly, I have these crazy urges to buy nail polish in every color and wild variations! Yesterday my nails were black: they made me feel edgy and chic. Today, they are a very light, baby pink: they make me feel very girly and gentle. I have beautiful nails, and they are my own :) And I paint them sometimes when I'm feeling colorful ;)

I work on self-love everyday. Feels so good to throw that nail-doubt, out!


sunny sidewalk

What a beautiful, sunny day! I felt my soul was thirsty as the rays soaked through my skin. I felt like the sunshine was dancing on my cheeks despite the cold wind chill. It gave me such a boost of energy. The sun's warmth makes me feel nimble. Walking to my building from the parking lot I stopped at a red light. The car on the corner did not budge although his light was green. From the looks of things it was a carpool, and they were all staring at me. I smiled and motioned to the green light with my thermos, and they either realized the light was green, thought I was cute, or were letting me cross the street on their right of way, but it doesn't really matter! All options equal positive energy for me! And I felt it! I love smiling to strangers that smile back, it's a secret world of giving good, and we all chuckled as the car drove away. We were looking out for each other at that moment, and the anonymity is what makes it that more special :) Happy Tuesday!

This was taken at home one evening as the sun was about to set. Compliments of Mike Jones, an exceptional photographer. Can you believe this photograph was taken with a sony ericsson phone that has only 3 megapixels? I suppose you can't hide the beauty of such a glorious power :)

Monday, March 2, 2009

sharing art

I am really digging this.

Marie Cailliau
a young french artist from Belgium

Spring Lovers

I feel a power
I can't speak
you make my knees so weak

Lemon grass
Sunny day
Bumble bee

Nibbling a carrot
You watch the nature be
We're made for each other

I do not need to speak

you know what time it is?

Lunch time!
I am having tuna salad today. I always bring my can of tuna seperate from my salad, which I bring in a tupperware. I mix at work to prevent soggy-ness. I also bring the dressing on the side. This was a really good game plan until the electric can opener started giving me craptacular performances. I fiddled with it for at least two minutes today before it started to actually open my can. Not that I'm high-maintenance but it was a little annoying and it makes a loud noise that I'm sure my co-workers can hear. I think tomorrow I'll have something else. Oh no wait, tomorrow is pizza day! Yay for Tuesday office meetings!